A Bisexual Blog for Women

Hi.. hope you liked my naff title.. am just wondering, was it all you thought it would be or did the experience let you down? Did it all come naturally (scuse) or was it a bit of a fumble? I am so looking forward to going all the way with a woman, but just thought.. what if its not as good in reality – you know?

“Well a little fumble closed eyes lights out etc but I suppose it helped that she had a few to drink and that we knew each other really well and we laughed a great deal and could be open with each other. i suppose all in all i wanted it so much to happen so it was more me holding back, but nevertheless yes I was nervous my first time and all but at the same time added to the excitement.”

“ I suppose a bit of both, it felt natural but i think we were both scared and nervous. It was great though !!! “

“The first time that I was with a woman I don’t think I had ever questioned if I was bisexual or gay or straight or whatever. Then my friend and I had a few drinks and we just started kissing and soon we were really into it. Maybe because we hadn’t really spent time worrying about it or anything it seemed to come very naturally.
It was a long time ago. I’m not sure how comfortable I would feel if I were with a woman now. If I felt self-conscious, of course I would not be comfortable whether my partner was a man or woman. ”

“Actually my first time was with a couple. She was 3 yrs older than me. It was around this time last year. I admit, I had no idea what I was doing I just acted as I did… She was really aggressive though and took over and wow, it was intense. I have to admit though, we kissed so passionately for the longest time it seemed. I enjoyed that more than anything else.”

“My first time happened this week, Monday. There wasn’t any fumbling, it was all so natural, there was no nervousness or awkwardness. We kissed for over an hour then made love, and then fell asleep in each other arms. I had imagined how my first time would be, but the experience was even better. I’m looking forward to many more passionate moments “

“My first time was great because the other girl knew what she was doing and enjoyed teaching me. Then when she got drunk at a party and told everyone at school we’d hooked up… that wasn’t so great because people were not very accepting of the whole thing and it was the hot gossip for quite awhile after…

“I have to admit – I’ll have to be a bit drunk for my first time and I know that I will probably fumble too much…. Hopefully – whoever it is with will enjoy teaching me the ropes ( or maybe even with the ropes..;-) ).”

“there was actually no fumbling in my experience…pretty surprising considering how much we had had to drink. She is a good friend of mine so I think that helped and we had kissed several times and flirted alot, so it was only a matter of time. I put some music on, lights were low…..it flowed very well.”

“I haven’t done much with girls before, just kissing and a bit of touching…I feel so stupid. My first time a kissed a girl, we were both drunk…but I still had a good time, she was beautiful. she hasnt said a word to me about it again, which kinda gets me down. so either she cant remember it or she chooses not too. hmm…”

 

Whats the best and the worst of it ? What sort of things do you like to see ? Raunchy, slow, seductive rather than sleazy ? What does it for you ? And what makes you hit the Fast Forward button every time ?

“Most all girl porn I have seen I have not really enjoyed, actually most porn in general! My husband calls me a porn snob! I do have a couple of favorite films though, depending on my mood:
Briana Loves Jenna ( just thinking about it and I have a hard time typing)
Erotic, hot, dear God! I own this movie!

The Fashionistas
A ton more hard core, bondage, lots of vinyl, but the girl-girl scenes are phenomenal!”

“I prefer lots of cunnilingus. There can never be too much! And the girls must enjoy what they’re doing. And it cannot be rushed. I am not interested in vibes or dildos and especially double headers. I loathe those things. I like for the girls to have pubic hair.
I don’t like girls that want other girls to spit on them. It makes no sense. I don’t like the slapping either. And those fingernails gotta go. And the fake orgasms…oh please. ”

” 100% agree on the nails thing… I cringe every time I see those huge talons go near !

I dont mind dildos and stuff…but (as you probably gathered) I HATE lingering shots of women sucking on them like they SOOOOOOO wish there was a man in the room. Double enders always look like too much work to me and they seem a bit..er…bendy…to give any real pleasure ?
(If it was a man we’d be asking is ‘everything ok hun ? Too much to drink ? And then telling him that it ‘happens to every man sooner or later ‘ ). So why we see women writhing in ectasy using them ? One of those things where the IDEA is far better than the rather floppy reality !

I also don’t like people spitting on their fingers before rubbing away like there’s no tomorrow. Friction !

And one of my pet hates is watching a nice 10 minute scene…THEN a man arrives and they act like they haven’t had sex for 10 years and both jump on his dick squealing !

I guess I just like to see normal seduction scenes where the two women seem relaxed, there are lots of lingering shots with their clothes on..slowly shedding them and like nmj PLENTY of oral. And yes, most of all for me too, I like to see the women look like they are enjoying themselves.

Far too much porn around today with women grimacing in pain being penetrated by two guys at once with 10 ” dicks….uggggghhhhhh… That MUST be painful ??? “.

“I have one F/F porn, and I think it is a series from “cockless” or something like that. It has all females and it is not raunchy or gross. It has 2 or 3 different scenes and they run for about 45 minutes to an hour each. It is very slow and sensual female sex. I love it!!!! ”

“I think for me the one thing that is missing from most porn

SENSUALITY

Why is everything made to look like it’s rushed, slow down, take time, enjoy……..I would then be hooked everytime !!!! Oh and Does anyone else find snarling a turn-off ?
I also find the repeated grunts of “Ooooh yeh Ooooh yeh” a bit distracting..”

“Have always loved female on female, not Male and female…. video, pictures and erotic stories. I like slow movies with females having their first lesbian/bi sex. I get very distracted with the sounds of fake “oh yeah right there”

“Prefer porn that is actual vs. staged… Ameteur and the like. Definately I’m most bot and hothered by the girl on girl action especially when she’s climaxing for real… I go over the edge if it is also a girls first time with another girl…….. hits closer to home. Having a man in it is okay for a bit but they tend to lack creativity and patience so I get bored.
Big porn turn offs – degrading talk (like “you know you want it B@#$H”) – jizz all over the place (I’m kinda a germ fanatic, plus it’s just plain ICK!) – dildo sucking (c’mon – what is the point?) – no foreplay sex (need I even comment?).”

I am livid right now…..due to Dr. RUTH!!!! Read this article that shows her ignorance and intolerance of BI’s!!

Dr. Ruth Doesn’t Believe in Bisexuality

“Well girls if this is a phase we are all going throught its being a hell ofa long time for me ,nearly 13 years.See someone else who just sees in black and white ,and likes us nicely boxed into one of two caterogies.I’ve never been one to conforming, like hell am i now .”

“This is unbelievable…How can she say things like this?… I thought that Dr. Ruth was more open minded and knowledgeable about this….Seems to me that she needs to open her eyes and look around the world a bit…I hope to see an apology from her in the near future…”

“OMG i just lost all respect for her now. If you dont know what u are talking about then dont say any thaing at all Ruth.”

“Well whats the shocker is that it is coming out of the mouth of Dr. Ruth! Someone who has devoted a lot of her life to the knowledge of sex. To completely be in the belief that we are all in some kind of phase…Sheesh!! ”

“How can someone who has studied sex and sexual behavior for so long believe this? and preach it too? Unbelievable.”

“Personally it just goes to show how some people are just ignorant. Liking both men and woman is not gay or lesbian it is Bi sexual. Good grief people like this drive me nuts lol.”

“She doesn’t know what she is talking about. I know I am bisexual. I like both men and women. “

Finally!!

Someone else who gets all excited and tingly when having a waxing session!! I often go to have my legs and bikini waxed and this is always carried out by really sweet, beautiful girls with perfect make-up and you can see that everything on them is so well taken care of, like waxed arms so you cant help but think that the rest of the body must be quite like that as well. Bald and soft.. I guess after the end of their shifts in the night they treat each other or so… So whatever… when lying down on that “bed thing” half naked and I smell the soapy-parfumed air, feeling their hands run up and down my legs, inside my thighs, turning me over, pulling my skin and then gently massaging me first with a special antibacterial cream to avoid skin irritation then with a scented oil… i just feel… I just feel a hard knot in my underbelly, ready to explode, like some seconds before coming.

Once or twice when their schedule is really heavy near summer I was treated by two girls, one on each one of my legs simultaneously…. I just CANNOT express the feeling seeing them down there taking care of me, all of us involved into something really personal…I am the only girl I know, and my friends think I am totally nuts that says “I love being waxed”. I actually went as far as saying I would love to be something like… that long insect with the too many legs that in my parts of the world we say it has “40 legs” so I could have them all waxed and maximize the wonderful sensation…. So finally.. maybe I am nuts after all…. The pain is minimal compared to the feelings I get. So if you girls dont have a particular skin problem or extreme pain fear I woud definitely suggest doing that in a nice environment, even once in your lives. No… actually more than once.. The first time usually hurts more than the next times…

” Here’s my Story :

don’t know if this post belongs in this category or another, but it is a true story I recently wrote about a bikini wax I had. Since it’s funny and sexy, I thought I’d share it. I’d love to hear what people think about it!I always look forward to going to the local spa, even when I shouldn’t.It’s a time honored female tradition — going to the local day spa andspending gobs of money to allow complete strangers to poke, prod, massage, coerce and cajole your resistant body into doing things yourbody isn’t inclined to do without assistance. Add in the guarantee of at least partial nudity (yours, not theirs), as well as all of thelotions, perfumes, candles, books, nailpolishes and other dreams thatare for sale in the lobby and what’s not to like?So it was without trepidation that I snagged a parking spot two blocksaway and wandered into the salon, shielding my eyes from the glare offthe plate glass storefront windows.

I was early by fifteen minutes,just enough time to get some serious shopping in before it was time tomeet the business end of a popsicle stick. Who am I kidding? I wasearly because I’m early everywhere. I’m the only woman I know whoconstantly carries a book in her purse, just so she’ll have somethingto do whenever she inevitably gets to her destination early (mostpeople would find someone to talk to, but I’m not that kind of girl,either).I checked in with the Spa desk (what I would’ve given for a true “spa”treatment) and turned around to look at a row of greeting cards fordogs. Clearly not my first choice for shopping entertainment, but itwas right there. After a minute, a cute girl with sandy blonde hairand piecey bangs that occasionally dropped in her face walked up tome. “Hi Jennifer”, she said with a thick yet untraceable accent, “I’mwaiting for my 2:45 eyebrow appointment to show up, and then we can goupstairs for your bikini wax.” “Okay” I replied, scanning herhip-hugger jeans and layered pink and white t-shirts.I’m one of the most uncultured people I know when it comes to affairsof an international scope (if Austin Powers asked me to be hisassistant and be an International Woman of Mystery, Austin would befucked) so I was truly at a loss as to where she might’ve come from.After quickly ruling out all of the suburbs that abut the mall, Idecided her accent sounded like a strange blend of Russian and French.

Seeing that I was unlikely to make any further headway on the issue,I turned my attention to the wall of OPI nailpolishes and began theother time honored female tradition of flipping each bottle upsidedown to read the name of the color (my favorite color name being I’mNot Really A Waitress).After about five minutes of polish flipping, she walked back over tome, slipped her hand lightly behind my back and said, “Are you readyto go upstairs?” I swallowed hard and said, “Sure. Let’s go.”Once upstairs, in a room decorated in wood the color of cappucino andwith music playing in the background that is supposed to be soothingbut belongs in a dentist’s office waiting room, I set down my purse.She started getting her instruments together, then turned to me andsaid, “I’m going to set this up.

You can just slip off your jeans andlie down on the table.” This is the point where most spa technicians(or whatever they’re called) would leave the room to give the wax-ee alittle privacy while dropping trou. Not her. The cuteRussian/French/from-somewhere-other-than-The-Gap girl turned backaround and started gathering her popsicle sticks and the strips ofpaper she’d soon be using. Ooookay. This is one dedicated woman. Ilike that. She’s not one to waste billable, er, productive time.Let’s get down to business.With jeans strewn over the wooden chair by the door, I nervouslypulled down my t-shirt a bit more and climbed onto the table. I lieddown flat on my back and she turned around, placing thecrockpot-shaped wax warmer between my legs near my feet. We made somesmall talk and then she walked over closer to my head and grabbed bothof my hands in hers. I felt like a teenager who was learning todrive. I’d seen someone else do it before, but when I had to put myhands on the instruments and steer, things got a little shaky.

She confidently placed my hands on my body — one on my thigh and one onmy stomach, and instructed me to pull the skin taut so the wax wouldbe smoother and closer. *sigh* Okay, this I can handle.We continued talking, which was far and away the easiest part. I couldn’t really see what she was doing, especially now that my hands were conviently in the way, so I watched her. She hunched over my leg, face in my crotch, scanning the terrain. Her bangs flopped inher face a few times, and she impatiently brushed them away andfocused on her work. She would occasionally look at me and smile,making my stomach not so much turn flip flops as slide sideways.

We kept talking until I came to the conclusion that I’d never become the International Woman of Mystery if I didn’t ask questions and learn things about other cultures. So I asked the one deep, profound question I could think of: “Where are you from?” “Oh, I’m from Brazil”, she replied.Of course you are. Through the course of the waxing, I alternated between pleasure and slight discomfort. She would take her soft, thin fingers and slidethem over my inner thighs to smooth out the skin so it was flat, and Ifelt tingly. A few seconds later, I’d feel a little warmth and then rrrrippppp. Ow. Seconds later, I’d feel the same soft fingers exploring between my legs, pulling my labia apart (is she looking? I wondered. Could she tell if I’m soaking wet? Would she care?), and then, rrrriipppppp. Seconds later, I could feel one of her fingers resting lengthwise down my labia, holding it in place, and all I could think was, “As God as my witness, if she moves her fingers one inch to the left I will double her salary” and then, rrripppp. *sigh* By this point, we were in the home stretch. She had waxed everything there was to wax in my far nether regions, leaving me almost bald,with a thin strip of hair in the middle. She then moved her hands upmy body and lightly tugged at the top of my g-string. She pulled it down a bit and asked, “How far do you want me to go?”, meaning she wanted to know how much I wanted her to wax across the top of my bikini line. All I could think was, “You’re the Brazilian, babe. You tell me”, but what I ended up saying was, “Oh, I’ll leave that up to you. You’re the expert.” She cocked her head, looked at the entire area for a moment, and with one hand on each strap of my g-string,pulled it all the way down, exposing everything I had to offer. This was new for me. Granted, the last time I had a bikini wax I ended up being waxed by a gay man who did nothing but complain about how much he hated giving bikini waxes the whole time, so this was a different ball game. Nevertheless, I wasn’t expecting to be stripped down and hand sanded. Five minutes later, we were done. I really wasn’t sure if I should give her a tip or light a cigarette, so I put on my jeans. She put away all of her equipment and fished out one of her business cards.She checked my information to make sure it was up to date and handed me her card saying, “The next time you need services, please call me.”Oh don’t worry, sweetie. I’ll call. ”

For Basic Waxing Tips Click Here !

To me it does feel like cheating and i’ll never do it again, but is it really?

“Hmmm, interesting one.My answer would involving asking myself one simple question (Ihope this makes sense!)Would I feel betrayed if my partner had cybersex?Answer: yesSo – I think overall the answer is yes. It is cheating. As cheating is betraying the person you are supposed to look out for above anyone else.”

“If one considers cybersex to be cheating ,then one could say that having fantasies about another while masturbating..is also cheating!I have read somewhere that even having thoughts of another can be classed as adultery.It would largely depend on how you approach it.If you see it as a bitof fun etc-I dont see how it can do any harm. May even enhance your ongoing relationship. As for many of us, who have been in long termrealtionships would admit, that the initial buzz tends to drop down to a gentle hum as the years pass.You find yourself really missing thosefeelings of lust & hunger.So I say …if it feels good……do it….just tread carefully!”

“A firm resounding NO from me!I have limited experience with it, and I often asked myself if it was my husband doing it instead of me would I care, again the answer is no. Its no worse than watching porn or getting a lap dance really. The end result is the same! Cyber sex is like made to order porn, if you think about it. ”

” feel that is is a little more personal than porn. There seems to be a connection between the two people (in the circumstances I have heard/read about) than if a person is looking at naughty pictures or watching a screen. I think that if you and your partner have open communication with each other about it and agree that it is okay for your own relationship, then that is between the two of you and that is fine. But when it is done behind someone’s back, without their knowledge and approval, I think that is where it crosses the line. ”

“If one considers cybersex to be cheating ,then one could say that having fantasies about another while masturbating..is also cheating! However it is the same with anything everybodys perceptive is different !!Each to there own !!! ”

“I hear what you are saying – but there is something in cybersex that does make me think it’s cheating. Maybe because there is a real person at the other end of the computer… rather than a fantasy in the mind. I just know that i’d feel hurt if someone I was in a relationship did this. Then again – I guess it could spice things up a bit! I guess it must depend on the nature of the relationship… ”

“But if it is a betrayal surely it ranks far lower than having real sex, after all it is just written words. ”

“I agree – it’s nothing like physically cheating. I guess you can have cybersex but still feel 100% loyal to a partner – which could not be said for a physical affair. Would anyone admit to cybersex with their partner? Or is it something kept secret?”

“yeh ill admit it, me and my partner have tried it! i think it was a turn on the fact that their doing something that turns them on and you are turning them on by what your doing, (with a web cam involved here of course)and the sex afterwards is great, its like watching live porn together lol ”

“I do agree with you there. the act of actually having sex with another person is far more personal than sex talk via computer. I think I’d be okay with it if my husband was open with me that he wanted to do it and offered to let me be there. Sex, on the other hand, I could not handle. ”

“I think it depend on if it the sme person everytime if so then i would say yes because theres a bond that can form after so many times with the same person.”

“I had cyber sex once by IM and it was kinda..oh..so that’s cyber sex .. big disappointment lol. Just words on a screen. Women can get soo over-emotional about their partner as *property*. I think it’s insecurity. But the whole issue of *cheating* is complicated by thing like cell pphones and PCs. When marriage was created, people lived simpler lives and didn’t live as long. So the 21st century problems like cyber sex and text sex don’t have simple solutions.I think myself, when we are looking to get into a relationship with someon, instead of being all mushy, we should say to him/her OK what are the rules, your version of? And thn if we disagree we either negotiate or look for someone else. Because ya have to be on the same page as a partner or it doen’t work. ”

“hi alli would consider it cheating if it was done in secret without either party knowing about it. but if it was brought into the open and discussed then i dont think its too much of an issue… but if you would have asked me the same question 4 months ago (oh that would be around the time of joining this site ) it would have been a great big no no on all counts. it just goes to show what can happen when you lay your cards on the table and discuss things openly can do.. at lease for me anyway. ”

“I feel that cyber sex is a way of cheating. You are talking dirty to a woman and telling them how you want them sexually. I know I would be pissed and hurt if I found out my man was doing that “

have been thinking the best way to word this topic ?I have a lot of gay male friends, and the topic of being bisexual is kept pretty much off the general conversation……frankly, I was fed up trying to defend myself, and why ?because every guy bar none find the concept of being bi quite beyond their comprehension ! 100% maintained all men who claim to be bi are in fact gay ! and the same applies for women too …….so…..I thought I would question and read answers on various lesbian and bisexual sites, about bisexual women.To sum up…..the majority of lesbians don’t want a relationship with a bisexual woman because they say they always get hurt !..we always tend to have either a husband or boyfriend at home waitingwe have a tendency to be quite promiscuous because we have choices of genderwe always are looking for someone betteror, if we do fall in love, most bisexuals rarely leave their husbands or boyfriends for a woman, as easily as if it were leaving for another man !AND if you meet another bisexual and fall in love…….what if one of you loves more than the other, and wants to set up home together….?Are they right ?

“Gays/lesbians really annoy me when they say those things. Have they forgotten the oppresion they received themselves? Why would they want to do exactly the same thing to the bi community?! After all it wasn’t so long ago that lesbians were believed to be non existant, how could two women have sex? Well it’s been proven that lesbians do exist and two women can have sex. Now how long do we have to wait before the gay and straight community realises that it is actually possible to love some one regardless of their gender? I’m sick of the flack we get off the gay community they really should know better! If i were looking for a gf by the way i could assure you it would not be a lesbian! I wouldn’t want her looking down her nose at me or assuming i’m going to cheat because of the allure of men! I’d go for another bisexual and i’d be faithful, because that’s who i am. I’m bisexual AND faithful. I’m sorry if the gay community cannot accept thats true, but their just their own biggotted opinions. What do i care?! ”

“QUOTE
–”we always tend to have either a husband or boyfriend at home waiting”

dont forget children, pets, and careers…. I fail to see the point (and just where did they read they couldn’t?)
QUOTE

–”We have a tendency to be quite promiscuous because we have choices of gender(it would appear they aren’t happy with the ones they’ve made) ”

My take on “We” is by way of maybe the human race. Faithfulness isn’t about sexual orientation its about respect, last I checked respect wasn’t exclusive to a certain orientation. (not to mention I have come across a great many male and female heterosexual sluts)

QUOTE
“–we always are looking for someone better”

I don’t think its limited to sexuality or for someone better. Rather we are all just looking for love… and they say love is blind so someone in love isn’t looking at all.

QUOTE
“–or, if we do fall in love, most bisexuals rarely leave their husbands or boyfriends for a woman, as easily as if it were leaving for another man !”

Sounds more like crap from a scorned lover to me. Would likely say the same of older vs. younger – taller vs. shorter – and so on…

QUOTE
“–AND if you meet another bisexual and fall in love…….what if one of you loves more than the other, and wants to set up home together….?”

Isn’t that really for the people involved to decide? I’m thinking it would be different for every situation, every individual and couple involved, and certainly not limited to one answer.Theres certainly nothing wrong with having a tentitive plan, but really life is lived mostly by crossing each bridge as you come to it.
I just think they’re jealous that bisexuals look better in rainbow colors.”

“I agree with you. I believe that a lot of those stereotypes can be put on many people regardless of their sexual orientation.”

“I absolutely don’t understand when they say we are promiscuous. A person can be promiscuous and be completely straight, as well as completely gay. To be promiscuous, it would take an individual to have sex with anyone they meet. I do love both genders but I wouldn’t have sex with every single person I met. I believe that if we are with someone, that’s who we are with. Be that a man or a woman, doesn’t make any difference. As for being married or with boyfriends, I can see why a lesbian wouldn’t like that. If she is looking for something serious, it would be annoying falling for a woman who had a relationship with a man.That’s why I would like to be involved with a woman who is also bi. The question about leaving a woman for a man, is very difficult because some of us are interested in women only sexually. I am a little confused about that. What do we really want? A friend who can also have sex, or something more serious? Like I said before in other posts, I thought I was only sexually interested until I fell in love with a friend. I could see myself in a real relationship with her. But for those who are happily married, how does that fit into the picture? ”

“There are a lot of “othered” groups which get labelled as promiscuous or trouble – the gay/lesbian community gets this label, too. It’s just another negative/fear-driven stereotype of marginalised groups, and bisexuals are sometimes “othered” by gays and lesbians.”

“Well as far as the falling in love one and setting up home together, my hubby wouldnt mind living with me and a girlfriend. Of course she would have to be willing as well. I dont think it is hard to make decisions. Each to their own and I hate people that stereotype. My thought is if they dont want to take the time to know me they are the ones missing out. Not me! I can easily balance my life. I can see where it is debatable but really. I guess us girls just need to stick together here!”

So, it’s October 18th……..oh, it’s weeks to go before Christmas you are thinking, but it’s not…so how prepared are you ?have the “little darlings” given you their reams of lists for presents and so on…..what about the tree, will it be a real one or artificial ?and where will dinner be held this year….your place or the parents or the in-laws ?how many are you cooking for, if it’s at yours ?I know some of you will already be prepared, but I bet some of you will be thinking OMG NOOOOOOOOO !Tell us, ladies Are you prepared ?Yo Ho Ho

I can tell you all now on my part no preparations have been made Y—e—-t… Noooooooooooo

I was on the bus yesterday when i heard this woman turn to her friend and say she saw two girls holding hands walking down the street. Her exact response was “errrrrrr thats nasty”. She then went on for 10 minutes about how if she saw them in the street she’d go up to them and tell them that they’re dirty. What makes her think she has the right to stick her nose into other peoples’ business? Not only that, but tonight my olds were watching some boring tv soap, when two gay men came on the screen, and they were like ” do we need to see this?”. All i can say is i’m glad they don’t know i’m bi, if past comments of “lesbania” (a mythical place where lesbians come from) and cheating bisexuals are anything to go by.

I think i’ll get back into the closet, it’s so warm and safe in here.*Hides from the world*

“Stuff like that just burns my ass. Women who are straight, tend to get grossed out. Straight men want to watch and join. There is no safe haven with a lot of people it seems. Even though the only person who knows of my desires are my husband, I still seem to take a personal offence when I hear things like that. My way of dealing with it is thinking of something I heard a long time ago. Homophobes are just people who are afraid of their own deisres and try to hide their own homosexual,/ bisexual tendencies from themselves by acting like they are grossed out by it. Guess they need to consciously think rude thoughts to tame what they think are the “wrong” thoughts in their own heads. If everyone of us who has ever been hurt by these comments remembers this then maybe it will enable us to better deal with them. ”

“The awful thing is, it’s not just the older generation who have these opinions. A short while ago I was in a department store in my town centre, just browsing around. There were 2 assistants sorting through some new stock and they were obviously talking about a girl they knew, my ears pricked up when I heard one of them say “She’s a lesbian, she’s not normal” I couldn’t help myself from turning my head and glaring at them both, but they were so dumb and oblivious they didn’t even seem to notice. ”

“It kills me that these types of people and comments are the reasons why some of feel the need to stay in “hiding” (as I do, except for from my fiance). If it were not for society’s continuing homophobic opinions, we could all be comfortable with ourselves and our sexuality and not feel the need to hide a part of ourselves from our loved ones and strangers alike. ”

“Yaw this burns me up. I was out with a few friend’s the other night drinking and dancing.And there was alot of girl/girl couples there dancing and alot of guy/gril’s dancing together.My friend said that women are only with women cuz they cant get the real thaing. Good thaing i havent told her I am bi yet. I liked watching the girls dance ect with echother. MM I dont think i will be telling any friend’s soon about me being bi they just cant handle it. *Hides in closet again*”

“Another bad thing….the actions of the adults are passed right on to their children…and the cycle doesn’t stop…I totally agree that they do it because they are either afraid to express their own identities – or they are envious that others feel a kind of freedom to do so that they don’t, and the only time they feel good about themselves is when they put someone else down…..It’s really sad that no one ever taught them how to feel good about themselves w/out having to act that way against others… ”

“there is nothing gross about 2 women holding hands, it doesn’t have to be sexual. I love holding hands with my best girlfriends, boyfriend, mom, etc. It is sweet and comfortable. How very sad that people don’t see the love and affection in that act. ”

“It isn’t just that. Homophobia or biphobia from “straight” people is one thing. “biphobia” from homosexuals is another. Why do so many homosexuals think that bisexuals are evil and sinful, while they’re fine? GRRRR ”

“You all are right. I was fortunate, although I didn’t think so at the time, but being almost 6′ tall at age 11 taught me that people can and will be cruel (used to get called ‘Amazon’, ‘Treetops’, ‘Jolly Green Giant’) in the face of something that makes them insecure. It was hell but I learned to understand that it was *their* fears and insecurities that was the problem, not anything to do with me. It also taught me that it was an opportunity to be a catalyst for others to work through their problems.Granted, sexuality is a bit more intense but the bottom line is the same. Are we going to let others’ fears and insecurities keep us in hiding out or are we going to rise the to challenge and be who we are? I am happy to see the younger generations being more comfortable with their sexual orientation. Unfortunately it will not be until the older generations die off before general acceptance is the norm. Very sad indeed.”

“Bloody Hell, I’d like to know what her thoughts would be on abuse, rape, murder, cruelty etc etc if she deems two girls holding hands “nasty”.”

“I have to agree with you girls you think in this day and age it would be a common sight my girls have no problems with seeing our neighbours who happen to be gay men kissing and holding each others hands,and my oldest at the moment is questioning her own sexuality (god they grow up quick )Even my mother in law who is a catholic albet a lapse one has no problems,her favourite saying is there for but the grace of god .Plus if we were all alike the world would be a boring place ,but as i tell my girls we are the better people because our minds are open and we accept anybody and everybody no matter there age,race sex or sexual preference. Does make you wanna spit in there eye though when they say something like that though”

“Unfortunately, there are still people out there who think bisexuality ect. is a perversion of the norm. I knew I was bi at 16 and came out at 19. My last lover was a bi-curious woman who was the same age as me. She was rather insecure about it and dreaded her family finding out.I was vehemently put on the spot by her mother because she wanted to know why I felt that “this type of behavoir was normal”. I don’t view my sexuality as being any different from anyone elses. It’s what I’m comfortable with and a lot of the time the people who make the comments are the ones that are only hurting themselves by being that ignorant.At 28 years old, friends and family both know that I’m bisexual and completely open about it, I’m simply shy about introducing myself to others in general. Yes, I do know what it is like to feel not accepted by the straight community and the lesbians won’t have you either because you still like men. Among bisexuals, both male and female I feel I can relax more and let my guard down. There’s actually more bi’s out there than you might imagine and many of us have felt that type of discrimination. Keep your chin up, and don’t let it get to you. If the world wasn’t such a diverse place, it would be awfully boring wouldn’t it?”

“It’s quite obvious that we are no more educated, in spite of it being 2005 !Men still come out with the pathetic “Backs to the wall !”….and women look down their noses at any form of behaviour different to their own…..I keep saying this, but…..what a SAD world !”

Hey Girls My dilemma is one that few of my male friends can understand ! I am 38 (hubbie is 36) … I had dropped subtle hints to my hubbie, about liking girls and what it would be like to experience a girl – his reaction was, are you turning into a lesbian! and if you wanna go and do that fine, but i’m not sharing you with anyone …. well not much you can say to that … he is a very black and white person … so my dilemma is – do i follow my curiosity and do it behind his back … or do i keep a lid on my feelings and regret it … i might try been with a girl and not like it (ha i doubt that!), but i would like to think that i only get one stab at life and surely carrying out something which i feel is right … is wrong ? A problem hey ?

“I dont know that id want to offer advise on such an important subject but i can tell you a little of my experience.I had a long term relationship with the father of two of my children and when i told him of my feelings his reaction was much the same as your husbands.It was one of the factors in our split but not the main one.I am now married to a wonderful man who knows all about me and supports me in every way.We have a very happy open relationship and long may it continue! ”

“I too have a hubby who is just like yours. He looks on my curiousity as somewhat of a joke..I have decided just to go ahead on my own as dont see why I shouldnt.I know its something he can never fulfill, so why should I not experience allI want to out of life.After all we only get one go at it.His narrow mind is his look out-not mine.So I say if its something you really desire then ….Go for it!Otherwise, you may spend the rest of your life wondering if?Remember there are so many of us in the same boat…but at the end of the dayits only you who can make the decision for you!”

“what you also have to think about is if you dont fufill this curiousity are you going to blame him?you may say no at the moment but that niggle will always be there.I hope you work it out hun”

“well, first of all let me just say I cannot tell you to lie- this, to me, is the worst possible thing to do in a relationship especially about something like this. I don’t agree with “cheating” and going behind your SO’s back. Now let me also say that my fiance is also unlike what I would expect of other guys (and in fact my best guy friend who knows about it, can’t understand it either)- although I sortof have permission to pursue something…he in no way wants to be involved- he doesn’t want to share me. that’s cool and all, but I think I’d feel abit wierd pursuing another relationship while I’m with him unless he was included…so there’s my dilemma…lol but I do somewhat understand the not wanting to share you part as for advice, not too much else I can say I don’t think… sorry… ”

“If you love your husband, my advice is not to do get together with someone else behind his back – it would be devastating for him. I wondered if there was any way you could incorporate your feelings into your sex play with your man e.g. watching girl on girl porn, sharing fantasies etc… If he can ‘handle’ this, he may feel less threatened with your bi-ness”

“your husband sounds as though he has graduated out of the same school of thought as mine! Im in that current dilema atm & I have thought about it every way which but can…The only person that can really decide is you. In the past when the ‘talk’ arises EG if we see a lesbian scene on a film etc, he has said that if thats what you want then I cannot possibly meet that. He feels very threatened by the fact that I even want to be sexually intimate with a woman again. He’s afraid that I would leave him and being a man, his pride would take a massive bashing! However I have always taken his feelings into account and he knows of my past experiences, whereby I try and explain if that was the case then I wouldn’t have married and would by now be living my life as a fully fledged lesbian. My own confusion is the fact I am not wanting a threesome with another man, now that I could understand. This is a difficult dilemma to be in and one that many of us can relate to, one way or another. Sorry I don’t any hard or fast answers. ”

” must echo something…. Men are very threatened by our desire to be with another woman for fear we may like it too much…i.e; they feel they wont measure up… which is why when its me and hubby in bed… he always talks about me being with another woman but the minute i mention liking someone or meeting someone he gets all jealous like!!!! UGH!!! ”

“We can advise you, but at the end of the day only you know whats right for your marraige. Though my opinion on this is that going behind your husbands back is cheating and if he found out could cause some very serious problems in your relationship. He clearly isn’t happy about the idea of sharing you and i can tottaly relate to your dilemma here as the same is happening with me. If he isn’t going to want you to see other women you’ve got some important decisions to make with regards to your marraige and whats more important to you? I’m sorry i couldn’t be more helpfull, but this is something you need to work out for yourself.”

“Lying is not the way and making sure your SO is secure is important. I do believe however that a person’s security is more their own responsibility. Until you work that out, you’ll have to walk softly.That’s one of the great things about sex in general, whether straigtht, gay or bi . . . it tests us to our limits and either makes us quivering idots or more confident and secure. But we all have to figure it out for ourselves.”

Hi and Welcome to the Bisexual Blog!! As a member of the ShyBi-Girls community, I thought it was about time that bisexual women had our own dedicated blogspot! Those of you who may know me already thanks for looking in.

Our main site is here :

http://www.shybi-girls.com

If you are new, well I guess that it’s not going to be long before we get acquainted!!!

Shybi-Girls.com Team